When and why did you decide to become an end-of-life doula?

The long and short of why I became a doula is because of the unexpected passing of my grandfather. I was so busy trying to plan his homegoing that I wasn’t able to grieve, and something said, “This shouldn’t be normal, nor should anyone have to go through this.” After lots of research and digging, I found INELDA, and was blessed to be a scholarship recipient and a graduate of their training program. The rest is history.

How long have you been doing this type of work?

I’ve been around this type of work my entire life in one form or another. My uncle is a funeral director, and I grew up in the church—needless to say there were lots of funerals. But I founded my own doula practice approximately four years ago.

What type of environment do you work in?

Usually hospitals, clients’ homes, nursing homes, and my own home when I’m meeting virtually. 

What do you do before you meet with a new client?

I always consult with either the client or family member to ensure that it’s still fine that we proceed with meeting and that I’ve answered any subsequent questions that may have come up. It’s also critical to ensure that all paperwork is signed. I meditate, consult with my colleague, and I try not to drink too much liquid so I don’t have to continually excuse myself to go to the restroom (I learned that one the hard way).

Can you share a short anecdote or insight that changed you?

Every day will not be good, but there’s always something good in every day. 

Who has been one of your teachers or mentors?

Honestly, every fellow doula, mentee, trainer, and client that I’ve come in contact with has taught me something. It could have been a new word, a new technique, or even something I may not want to embrace. I’ve learned so much from so many. Thank you!

What do you wish you had known when you started as a doula?

Well, it’s usually feast or famine. There are times when you wonder, “Are my phone, email, and website down?” because I’m not being contacted. Other times you’re wondering, “How am I going to make time for everything that’s going on?” As a doula, always be prepared and expect the unexpected.

Do you have any words of encouragement for fellow doulas?

Blaze a trail for those future doulas who will come after you, and be the change that you want to see in the world. We, like those we serve, have a limited time on this earth, so try to make an impact and make it easier for future doulas, just like those who tried to make it easier for you.

What is your dream for your practice or doulas in general?

A dream I have for my practice is to expand and to have a doula collective. I understand that doulas may have specialties that they enjoy over others. For example, a doula may enjoy supporting those who are actively dying as opposed to advance care planning. I envision a doula collective where doulas can focus on their specialties and where clients benefit from receiving the best support possible from their doula, as a result of doula specialization.